eergh

I have been finding myself very silly.

The first occasion of embarrassment happened like this: I applied for a show, sort of a voluntary community-ish affair, that has as its theme mental well-being and is to run in a few weeks. Time passed, the show approached, and no response was received from the curator.

Grr, I said, earlier this week, bloody curators! They don't even let you know that you haven't been selected! And it's for mental health! The irony of making people depressed by denying their application to a mental health awareness event! THE IRONY.

 All fired up and dangerously intoxicated by my own pique, feeling I was striking a blow for all artists everywhere and anyone in the world who hasn't Been Got Back To In Timely Fashion, I flamed off an email to the curator:

Dear whosit,

I didn't get an email saying my work wasn't chosen for Your Festival - I wonder did it go missing or something, as I am sure you wanted to acknowledge all entries, and the work that went into them?

Blah blah, good luck with the show anyway, etc.

And she replied immediately: The reason you have not yet received an email is because your work has been shortlisted. As an artist I completely understand the time and consideration each proposal takes...

Oh! CRINGE. And:

Our festival is run by six volunteers, we organise all events in our spare time, we appreciate your patience.

I DIED on the spot, even as I was leaping to the ground off my high horse and apologising profusely for the jumping of the gun. And then, when I met her, (of course) she turned out to be a) terribly nice and b) friends with loads of my art world friends.
I RE-DIE.

The second thing: something seemed different about the front of the house on Monday morning. Like something.. lacking.
I told the JB: My bike! It's just like.. gone. It's not there, I tell you! Someone must have taken it!

Two or three days flew by. Then Sister 1 texted me: Your bike is outside the wine shop. Which made me so happy! And yet, annoyed! Because what kind of hooligan does that? A drunk one? But no, (you'll be amazed to hear) the penny didn't drop. I texted Sister 1 back: The cheeky beggers! Is the lock broken? and she: No, it's securely locked, by you? And I, (finally twigging it): OH. Oh! O-oh.

I do remember leaving it outside the shop, though, it must be said that I also remember leaving it outside the house. But what with the physical evidence to the contrary, I have to accept the reality of the situation. Which is that I am a twit.

Your ridiculous,
T

ps. Have a good weekend.

Comments

[May]

Bless you, you dear sweet person. I apologise HUGELY for laughing my head off at this post. But I did. Esp. the wino-bike bit (I've done variations on the first one so many times I am immune, IMMUNE, I tell you, and can say, oops, my mistake! with the grace and cut-glass vowels of the Queen herself).

Anyway, SHORTLISTED! YAY!

[Dr Spouse]

I had to laugh, but only because I've lost my bike before - in a different bike rack to the one I thought it was in.

Hooray on the show!

[Pale]

Ah. Yes. Sorry to say, I know this phenom well (the black hole brain thing).

In your defense, it would help if they would lay that bit about the volunteers on you before you apply, so you know what to expect and are less likely to get bunged.

YAY!!! on the show.

T, you have to post pics. !! You know, just the atmospheric backs of darkened heads nibbling cheese and sipping a mellow red and gazing appreciatively in front of your illuminated work, which we see in focus in the b/g. So we can pretend we were there, feeling proud.

XXOO

[a]

OK, in your defense, if she was able to fire off an email in response to yours immediately, shouldn't she have found the time to tell the participants that they had been short-listed? I mean, sure, volunteers, no resources, etc., but don't you want to secure the people you're short-listing?

Nothing to say on the bike though. That's just funny.

[Womb For Improvement]

The other day I trudged to work grumbling because I had left my bike at work and walked home after a christmas do. It was only when I went to get my bike at lunch time to nip home to walk the dog I remembered I'd left it at home the previous lunchtime because I knew I wouldn't cycle home after the Christmas do.

Even with proper (and sensible) forethought I forgot. Doh!

[Twangypearl]

Ooh Liz. Thank you! I am not alone!

[Valery Valentina]

Hi! Just musing over the reality of the situation, wondering if this is how twitter was invented. Now all we have to do is wait for twitst...

(and speaking of black hole brain, do you have more than 1 Sister?)

[hairy farmer family]

LOVE you, lady, I does. Like me, you is.

[bunny]

Heh! I hope it was because you'd drunk bottles and bottles of wine and not just impending senility. And my e-mail would have been totally snitty and left me much totally ashamed, so I applaud you for keeping your cool, and also for saying something, because even if they are all volunteers and whatnot, they should still have sent you some notification.

[Adele]

I do similar things all the time. Glad to know I am in good company. I have literally spent days of my life searching for cars in airport carparks. And did on a certain occasion begin to report one as stolen. Not stolen. Very embarrassing. I like to think it is the symptom of a brilliant mind.

(I cringed for you about the curator. And she WOULD be a friend of friends. You're lucky she didn't move in next door:)

[Twangypearl]

A brilliant mind! Oh, if only!
The cars I've lost, Adele, the cars.

[Twisted Scottish Bastard]

We've all been there.
Lecturing and criticising because of someones' obvious failings, and then finding out...

Slightly worried about the bike outside the wine shop incident.
How much wine did you drink while you were inside?

Normally I find it takes at least 2½ bottles of a robust red, or about 1 bottle of whisky.

[Fernando]

I laughed out loud, too. Thank you, I needed that.

Think of the warm fuzzy feeling you must have give the curator, being able to reply like that. Or, consider this, maybe you hadn't been selected at all? Maybe she put you into the exhibition just so she could send smug email back and make you cringe? Maybe your email got you into that exhibition! Personally, I'd put your drawings in the National Gallery, but I'm not a curator...

[manymanymoons]

You're in good company. Situations like these are the story of my life.

Have a wonderful holiday weekend!