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August 2007
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September 2007

social eptitude

It's been a quiet week at my home of Hawthorn Hill, at the edge of the - eh - suburbs.
In the flat featureless landscape of the week's news, finding a frog/toad at the side of the gate was a big spike in the thrillometer. The froad sat there, fat, motionless and even perhaps a bit dead. I rushed back to the house to get it something - what? a glass of water? some aspirin? a small reviving whiskey? but when I got there realised the pointlessness of the mission and got my camera instead to capture the froad moment. Sadly bots, you will have to wait to see the pictures, since I am struggling with narrowband at a prehistoric 24kps and no cable for my camera.
When I came back from the walk in Little Forest, froad was gone - presumably having come back to life and crawled off. Or, very possibly, maybe a princess kissed him and transformed him into a prince. I have heard of that happening alright. I think it was on the Disc*very Channel.

I may be a bit lonely. When the JB came down to visit on Saturday I tried to keep him here, but he made good his escape on Sunday evening, back to Dublin on the Irish Setter bus. Pity. I would have been good to him. I would have fed him, cleaned out his cage, taken him for a walk everyday.
I sweeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar. I would so!

Today the only words I have exchanged with Other Humans were:
Oh, you're working today. Grand, so!
Polish fellow: nodding and smiling fiercely as one does when one doesn't speak the local language.

And a desultory chat with Ger, the neighbour who was finishing off his wall. I might have lost a bit of the power of conversation, due to lack of practice, as in:

Hi Ger, how are you?
Not so bad, how's things with yourself?
Ah grand, how are you?

Yes. The second How are you? (though not unheard of in Ireland, the place whose motto might as well be Never Use One Word When Two Will Do) was a bit superfluous. But Ger and his wife are very socially- whatdoyoucallit, ept. And carried on regardless.

Going to watch Nigella making fast food, now.
Oh I am middle-aged, again.


Spike-sitting Part IIIVIX

Friday afternoon I spent looking after Spike. He was funny as ever and not deterred by a bit of a cough, he got wildly excited in the garden and shrieked with excitement when I lifted the watering can up so it showered him. He was a bit wet then, as one might expect, and I thought it was best to take off his tee-shirt. Never one to be in for just a penny, he whipped off his trousers and pants too and ran thrilled around the garden, peeing experimentally (I thought it best to ignore this, I wonder if that was right?), climbing into his water playtable and circling me like a mad thing until I was sure he'd throw up. As it wasn't all that hot, he was persuaded to come back into the house with the bribe of Happy F**t, but a reclothing was denied flatly. No. He got into his bed and said "sleepy" but somehow wasn't sleepy enough to sleep (though at this point, I could have) so up he got again and did some more Happy F**t. I wrapped him in a Spiderm*n towel and had him on my knee where he was just getting the noddies when Mummy came home.

New words include the brain-washed mantra: Coming soon, to be uttered when images are loading in to the browser, or before a DVD starts. He got frustrated sometimes though, what with my lamentable slowness in learning Spikespeak, and at one point grabbed my finger and put it on the keyboard saying (something like): FINGERS.
?
Your guess is as good as mine.


Kerry - 07 with sunshine



In Kerry I was gently reminded of how nice it is to get away from it all. It. Computers, work, obligations, conversations, TV, pressures, responsibilities. The Lord knows I don't have too many of them, but this didn't prevent me escaping them with delight and having a lovely time laughing with the JB. We cycled for miles and at night fell into a deep healthy sleep in the dark back room of the creaky old house. The sun lit up the land and bounced off the sea around us. We went to Valentia and walked out to the Lighthouse past where the first transatlantic cable was sent, to what felt like the very edge of the world.

Next county Newfoundland, indeed.

Kerry snippet:
At the kitchen table.
e: Do you have any jam in the house, do you think?
KDiddy: I never have jam in the house E! Too. Much. Trouble.
JB, in explanation, to me: It must give backchat.


Ah. Lovely days.


a foreign body

On Friday, a foreign body was found in the daily soup. A phone call from Enrico, my former-fella from Italy.
Allow me to bore you, bots, with the (translated) transcription of the conversation:

Foreign Body: Ello, Mrs Geeko is there please?

E, resignedly: Si, ciao Enrico.

(It is not worth telling him Mrs Geeko is my mother. That lesson has fallen on his deaf deaf ears too many times already. Well, in a way, poor old E. His parents are so critical and controlling with him that, out of sheer self-protection, he has grown both a Rhino-hide as thick as a tree trunk that prevents the assimilation of any new instruction, no matter what it might be, and a frightening ability to tell lies. The only drawback to this arrangement is how hard it makes it for him to learn anything at all. It's left him stranded in a kind of perfidious double-world where he can suspend truth as easy as other people pour milk.
This urked me. You could not pin him down on anything. It was as if he believed if he never admitted to anything, he could skim along free of the consequences. He treated me shoddily, what with the lying, the hitting on of my friends, the cheating, and the mother. Jeepers, she was The Worst Manipulator Known To Man.
Huh, the whole scenario reminds me a bit of Demented Millionaire Boss + Mother, now I think of it. Although I hasten to add that I never was involved that way with DMB).

FB, (in Italian): Happy BIRTHday!

E, (confused pause). Err..

FB: two days ago I mean!

E, flummoxed: No-

FB: Wait, isn't your birthday the 27th?

E: It's the 28th..

FB: Right, the 28th! Oh sorry!

E: ..of April

FB: (almost offended by my insistence on this): No, I was convinced it was 2 days after mine.. (and as penny drops) oh yeah, of course! you are Taurus..

E: (I am INFJ I tell you! Me and Nelson.) Says, flatly: No, yes, April.

FB: So how ARE you? Long time no hear!

E: err, yes, indeed. Very well thanks..

FB: Married?

E: (What's it got to do with you?) Last July, yes. We bought a house recently and blah blah blah.

FB: Children?

E: (No, really, what's it got to do with you?) No, not yet.

FB: Well you told me you were getting married and then I heard nothing else about it..

E (hackles up, thinking: yeah, I remember that conversation, you didn't even congratulate me, but what? You think I should have invited you to my family-only wedding? Hmm, I can see that conversation with JB. "Darling, I know we said we'd have a really small family only wedding, but I thought we'd slip my old boyfriend in the back? you know, the one who rings me every two years? that cheated on me? Mm, I'd really like him to be there and I'm sure you feel the same")
Says (as neutrally as possible): We kept it small, just the family..

FB: So tell me about yourself?

E, (what an awful question): e blah, and blah, and Masters, and work and blah.

FB: (now having jumped the boundary of correctitude, is now crashing about obliviously, disturbing the wildlife): How do you have your hair now? Is it long or short?

E: (spluttering, says the long awaited): WHAT HAS IT GOT TO DO WITH YOU?

FB: What do you mean? Of course I care! you were one of the most important stories of my life and of course I care!

E: could have said many things, amongst which: FB, you are developmentally arrested if to you the important thing here is the length of my hair.

But why bother eh? Waste of breath. Some people are from Mars, some are from Venus, and some are from Just Don't Get It Planet.

His parting note was that he and his mother are coming to Ireland, and he'll be back on looking for guidance.

Oh joyful, joyful day that will be.