rude question
on belonging

clangers

I don't know, folks, I DO NOT KNOW. Do they not have a class in Medical School called:
TALKING TO THE OTHER HUMANS, YOU KNOW, ABOUT THE HUMAN STUFF?

My GP, huffing her way through the medical report tickboxes (part of the Indian adoption pack), declaiming the "generic diseases" as Not A Real Thing, as predicted, also felt the need to explain to me that the Authority likes you to have done lots of fertility testing, so that's all resolved. (!!) Huh, I thought. Next she'll say I need closure and I'll have to kick her in the shins and run away, like a reverse leprechaun. And then we came to the HIV test and she felt inspired to remark all gossip-like:

They had to add this because so many gay men are adopting now, and you know, they're a high risk group.

I MEAN, REALLY. Sadly, as so often in these situations, my brain shut down in sheer disbelief, saying What? What? Do not compute! Do not compute! and all I could think of to say was:

So we'll get tested too, it's only fair.

Yeah, THANKS, BRAIN. What I wanted to do was make a stand in the form of an incisive diatribe on the nature of fairness and equality and ferfeckssake, DOCTOR, it's called DISCRIMINATION, and you're passing it on. Never mind the assumptions that: you know the testing criteria of India (who don't even accept gay adopters!) and that "so many gay people" are adopting, which can't even be true, because they can't! And you feel the need to gossip on that basis!

MY HEAD JUST EXPLODED. What a mess.

Before she took the blood test, she managed to fit it a quick: 
Chances are you don't have it!

Which was lovely too. Grrrr.

(As it happens, she just rang me and said the tests came back all fine.)

+++

Even Kittaloo doesn't want to know.


IMAG0215

 FERFECKSSAKE.

Okay, calmness, calmness.

++

In other news:

  • I am still a salt fiend. Except when I am a sugar fiend! Why is moderation so hard?

  • I went to visit my parents yesterday. When I left at about 11am the JB was relaxing on the sofa taking in a few swimming heats. I returned from said parental social interaction at about 7.30pm to find him in exactly the same position, but now with feverish gaze. He'd be persuaded to leave the box of extreme attractiveness for a minute but then he'd mutter oh! A FINAL! and would be gone again.  

    I admit I am enjoying it too. I find it tremendously diverting to be impressed by these extraordinary feats of human endeavour, and make dopey remarks like: My goodness! That is bendy! or Oh no! A stepback on landing! (which constitutes our expert commentary on the gymastics) and such-like. How about you? Do you know about such things?

  • OH SUCH HUGE massive relief for Valery. PHEW, PHEW. Phew.

Comments

a

You probably should have kicked the GP in the shins anyway. She sounds like she needs it.

We've been watching a bit of that coverage too - amazing how someone who is completely disinterested in sports can become enthralled by a bunch of people rowing a tiny little boat...

Valery Valentina

Or stamped on her toes... It's Gay Pride week in Amsterdam right now. My head is too slow to explode, so thank you for spelling it out for me.

On the Relief bit; I had to look this up : http://twangypearl.typepad.com/twangypearl_the_elastic_g/2010/03/lost.html
that was 10w 5d. I remember sending you (half?) percentages for every day, thinking we were mostly there. Reading your entry before that one I suppose it is a good sign I'm still so very tired (although that didn't work 2 weeks ago)
Oh well, sorry for being so gloomy while you are supporting me so. Just, scary times. If it happened to you....

Olympics yippy: Rowing yes, men, those arms! drool!

Twangypearl

I understand Val. I thought the phew was worth saying. Just phew for the moment, and that's plenty. xx

Bionic Baby Mama

i am hoping that your GP was acting according to the conditions of some dare or other prank among her colleagues. what a piece of work.

the bean and i have figured out how to watch the olympics despite our country's best efforts to prevent us doing so, and yes, so many bendy muscles. judging by the clapping, he favors synchro diving, while i prefer gymnastics. it is novel, listening to the BBC instead of our usual lot. much better epithets ("stout little fellow," "little twister"), and i am fascinated to hear them say gymNASTS rather than GYMnasts. sounds so dirty.

Andie

Oh, for heaven's sake. This would be one of the reasons why I hate going to the doctor (whence I am about to go, as it happens).

Very good news for Valery.

I know absolutely nothing about sports. And so far have seen about one minute of the spectacle, which was dull as dishwater. Ergo, I will probably end up watching some rubbish called Masterchef AllStars instead.

Adele

Oh my. Those are the moments when one doesn't know exactly where to look. Or what to say. Amazing that anyone still thinks that way. Good on you for saying it's only fair to get tested.

Ah, the sugar. I sometimes have such an overwhelming, crack-like need for the white stuff (er, the sugar) that it scares me. I also love salty. And am happiest when I follow one with the other. And then back again.

The Olympics are...hypnotic. No other word for it.

Womb For Improvement

Doctors often seem to forget they are talking to real life people, with their own views. Bless 'em.

bunny

I don't think they can possibly get any training in being human. Or else medicine attracts a high proportion of people who are immune to such training. I'm sorry you weren't able to come up with an instant response indicating utter outrage, but I think only extra superhuman people are good at that kind of thing. I know I'm dreadful. Doubtless you've thought of a few since then...

OH! BENDY! is the perfect response to the Olympics, I think. I would watch them if I had the opportunity, but alas, I get to pretend I am above such things.

Fernando

An enlightened GP indeed! I can't believe there are still doctors who say gay men are a high risk group.

Send your GP the link to my blog. Or the link to New Family Social. Or change GP.

Isn't it annoying when you can think of a million thigs you could have replied to someone AFTER the fact?

Pale

Yikes. How did I miss this? (Don't answer that.) Just got back from a short trip and whoa. What do you mean, she posted this 6 days ago? (I was only gone for a weekend.) Blogger Reader: FAIL.

"How about you? Do you know about such things?"

Gawd no. But it only bothers me when the person next to me asks me to explain it to THEM. Even then, only vaguely.

I agree with A. It's amazing how you can get sucked in even though you haven't a sports fan bone in your body. Though I am still very prone to distraction. Found myself commenting at length to Mike about the physical appearance and personalities of a bunch of sprinters last night. I think somehow the visual spectacles of The Olympics are what reel me in. Which it would be. Shiney things. Vogue-looking characters. Titans of sport. Colorful flags and suits. Things on fire. NTM Interpersonal drama (in my head).

Ah, enlightenment. Who has it? There is a big sucking sound over here at the moment on that subject as well ... can't even get started ... The Boy Scouts (you should see the molten comment I left on that petition). Chick-A-Filet. If you are curious, you need only google the words. But it's really the same old bigotry, new chapter. Big sticks -- no attention to detail required. It's like sand in your bathing suit. You can shake alot of it off, but the tiny, persistent grains are what rub you really raw.

MWAH.

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